Firstly - How dare I... In the midst of 'finding Lara' I "lost my voice" and didn't stay in touch!... Sorry for being a blog snob! Hopefully this post makes up for it!
Dear Diary (because really - this is what this is!!!),
Looking back at the past year I'm exhausted. It's almost been a whole year (come 2 November) since I first left for Camp Biggest Loser. If you had asked me 12 months ago if I was capable of going through this much change I would have laughed in your face. It's almost sad looking back to that shy, overweight, unhappy girl... that girl who by chance one night was sitting on her computer and checking her emails when the Biggest Loser Audition call came up. And let me tell you, that girl was NOT prepared for that truck coming around the corner!!! And you know what.... I WOULD DO IT ALL AGAIN. Yep - crazy I know... but from all the craziness came about a shitload of truth (scuze the french). Every struggle and tear has now built me a solid foundation for a kick ass version of me. This Lara - this round, is prepared. So since coming back from Bobs... I've come back on a mission. Put Lara first. Yep - selfish I know... But let me tell you - It's been a long time coming! I've spent alot of time putting other people first - and in my quest of finding lara - I decided to try out a quirky little concept...
A good friend of mine once told me she decided to get involved in a relationship with herself... I laughed... but.. as crazy as it sounds - I love it! Me... Lara Whalan... is now in a relationship with.. me! (Can you see the Facebook Relationship update comments? - hahahah should I try it?) So the concept of being in a relationship with me - is that now I can do whatever I want, where I want, when I want and I can only hold myself accountable for how much fun I have! I can learn to love myself - every part of myself, and spoil myself on occasions... I can keep myself happy and fit by going to my favourite gym, and I can constantly surround myself with people who Lara loves (my beautiful friends and family). Regardless of the people who come in and out of my life - I have someone with me who will be there until the end of time, someone who will absolutely love me unconditionally and will always be there to pick me back up when I'm down.. yep - you guessed it! Me!!!! I can't let myself down - and if I have - it's my own doing... and the best thing? I can trust myself 100%.
Now I am sure you're probably reading this going - what a load of bullshit. But think about it... if everyone on planet earth packed up and left tomorrow - who would you be left with? Who is it that you can 100% rely on and trust for the rest of your life? So who - if there is anyone on the planet..should you get to know more and learn to love even more then that? Yep - you guessed it. YOU.
Hate it? Love it? Use it? I don't care...
Because Lara LOVES it....
Since coming back from Bobs, I've put myself first... and taken my own advice.. I've taken Lara to my happiest place ALOT (the beach), scored a job at Lara's favourite gym - doing something I find amazingly rewarding, and I've even managed to meet a beautiful man who Lara and I are extremely fond of!! I surround myself with beautiful and positive people who I love and who ultimately make me feel happy (my friends and family). Personally, I think this new relationship has started off with a bang ;)
Signing off from another crazy entry,
Me xx
